10 Reasons to support France

Ok, we are down to the last two after Germany confirmed their status as the 3rd Ranking Team in the World (at least until the next World Cup). Not any of my fave teams but then if you are looking for reasons to support any of them, here’s ten reasons for France.

1 Good night’s sleep An Italian victory will inspire your local ex-pat community to drive around in fiats beeping their horns until the wee hours.

2 Commiserations Italian players are far more entertaining in defeat. Expect wild mourning, large, floppy-haired men weeping dramatically and mass resignations/retirements

3 Zidane worship French success will speed the Gallic cult of Zidane, leading to an eventual Henry VIII-style schism with the Church Of Rome and founding of Zidanglican faith

4 Fabien Barthez Command of physical comedy and bald fellow good looks have single-handedly rekindled interest in the film oeuvre of British acting great Donald Pleasance

5 Henry’s ear Thierry Henry is likely to maintain his hand-cupped-to-ear celebration for so long he suffers temporary paralysis of the elbow. Which should be a laugh

6 Makelele’s gift to the Premierhsip Appearances in the Chelsea midfield have enriched the English language with the phrase “that Makelele role”

7 Chimbonda’s World Cup The man who was too big for Wigan has been out Walcotting our own Theo – on the bench all the way to the final. Bound be first to get his hands on the trophy

8 The Walliams effect We’re all brothers now after the Little Britain star’s record-breaking crossing of La Manche this week. They give us fine wine and cheese. We give them a man smeared in Vaseline.

9 Three degrees of separation France win the World Cup. France beat Portugal. Portugal beat England. We’re only three steps away from glory

10 They’re due a win at something Of course we don’t like to gloat but losing the Olympics must have come as a bit of a blow. Not that we like to gloat.

(Text taken from The Guardian)

Next post will be 10 reasons why you should support Italy. hehe….

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